How easy it is to see the flaws.
You have them, I have them, we all do. Spending our lives in close contact with someone as we do in our marriage relationships gives us intimate knowledge of each others failings and shortcomings. And oh boy, can we make a list.
Ok, so there we have it ... no one is perfect! Big revelation there.
Paul is simply encouraging us to focus on the other parts. To look for and identify the things your partner does well, to notice the things that are commendable, the things that are excellent.
Remember what mom used to say, at least my mom did, "If you cant say anything good, don't say anything at all."
Paul is taking it a step further. As true as it is that all of us have faults, we also have good traits, all of us do some things well. We ought to be looking for them and when they are identified, actually speak those words of affirmation and appreciation to our spouse.
"Man, I am going to have to really look hard."
Ha! Well that may be so, but it will be an investigation that will yield great fruit.
Our relationships can at times corkscrew into bickering and fault-finding and criticism. We can change that immediately with a change of mind about the words that we speak. We simply choose to approve what is excellent rather than amplify what is imperfect.
I challenge you to speak a word of affirmation to your spouse today. Tell them something what you see in them that is excellent. It will bring immediate results, of that I am sure.